2021: The Year I Trust In My Intuition

It turns out the fire in my belly is guidance, not indigestion.

Photo by Ava Sol on Unsplash

Ever since I was little, maybe six years old, I would have a crush on a boy and then call him mine. We’d be boyfriend-girlfriend for like a minute, and soon, this quake would come into my belly, telling me it wasn’t right.

I was six. Of course, it wasn’t right, but still, I’d be in pain if I didn’t speak to it. After two days, it became too much, so I’d dump him — finally choosing my well-being over a relationship (Yea! Go, Brittany!).

Simultaneously, I was aware that the entire experience was in my head. The guy wasn’t feeling a thing, and I’m over here, on fire.

“Your body is your best guide. It constantly tells you, in the form of pain or sensations, what’s working for you and what’s not.”
― Hina Hashmi

This same thing still happens to me.

Now — twenty-three years later —I’m recovering from a fresh dance with this sensation. Recently, I started on a dating app and I met this great guy. We had been talking for nearly a month (that’s like a decade in online dating) and we finally met.